I like it so far, but you made a few errors. You forgot that, the one he was betrothed to before he met Evelyn was Cielia. Until, when they were thirteen and mutually decided to remain "just friends"; since they did not have romantic feelings towards each other, and both of them weren't sure of Eric's sexuality. (You would probably have to add that, he's been attracted to some boys before; when he was growing up in boarding schools. But, he never revealed that info. to anyone as he would be shunned and severely punished for it. Until that is, he met Claude later in life. Then, gradually as they got to know each other; Eric started feeling more and more comfortable with being himself around him. And that's when, they fell in love). Then, shortly after the mutual rejection with Cielia, he met Evelyn whom he ended up marrying; and having Victoria with, because it was his duty. She was also his failed sexual/romantic experiment. (Although miraculously, he managed to hold an erection long enough to make a child; and during the few times they "made love" for Evelyn's pleasure. He probably pictured her as a guy, in order to get through that. But, he knew she was not...Which made him unhappy whenever he was alone).  Plus, she ended up being a bitch towards her daughter during the divorce; probably because, she ended up having most of her father's personality traits. And Eric, wanting to protect his child, fought for her custody in court; and won full custody. Also, before Claude got hired as the Middleford's butler; he used to be the Trancy's (Alois's) butler, not the Phantomhives's. I know I didn't specify who became the future Phantomhive butler in my story, after Sebastian married Cielia; but I imagined it would probably be Tanaka....for the time being anyway. They probably would have to hire someone else, once he gets too old for the work. But, that story is over. You can add this to yours, if you feel it's necessary though.  This paragraph is a bit out of order. But, I wrote my thoughts as they came to mind; and I'm sure they'll make sense when you read them. If not, I'll explain them again.